You know… In case you were wondering.
I realize I sound like a broken record, but we’re still waiting. The longer and longer the Army waits to let us know if we get to leave or if we have to stay, the less optimistic I becomes. And let’s face it, I’m not a terribly optimistic person to begin with.
The last month or so, I’ve been bombarded with some pretty vivid dreams–surprise, surprise–and last night, they were all centered on getting an answer. To say that worrying over it has taken up a lot of my time would probably become an understatement. It’s getting ridiculous, in fact. Yesterday afternoon, S forwarded me something from his work email (it was the flyer with directions to the organizational day tomorrow… more on that later), and the minute I saw the official-looking Army title, my heart jumped into my throat, and my fingers couldn’t pull up my email app on the phone fast enough.
I think my heart was beating about 500 times a minute by the time I realized it wasn’t what I thought it was. Since that major let down, I have felt like it was coming–moments away, even–and that hope leaked into my dreams. Of course, I dreamt that I got a phone call or text message or email about 50 times, but I never got to hear/read what the verdict was. It’s probably a good thing I didn’t have a doctor’s appointment today, because I am sure my blood pressure is through the roof.
I’m gearing up for deep depression, though. After waiting this long, that’s all it can be, right? We’re getting a big, fat no, because really, that’s all my luck is good for.
More Army whining later, I’m sure.
